Drowning in sorrow; back to the time of the death watch as Glen slipped away.On February 6, 2009 I wrote:
Glen has been getting radiation therapy...after seven treatments and increased pain medication the pain has not diminished. I now assist Glen in almost all of his daily needs...all in all I am exhausted by the end of the day...
Glen’s mom has started radiation treatments, to relieve the pain in her shoulder. She is in the hospital and hoping if she can manage the pain, she can go home.
On February 18, 2009 I wrote:
It is 5:15 in the morning. I tried to slept on the couch last night to be close to Glen - very restless sleep - kept waking up...Glen, twitching in the chair, oxygen on, c-pac off...I am trying to think things through. I need to figure out what options lie ahead...yesterday, news from the MRI brain scan that Glen has 10 to 15 lesions (cancer spots) in his brain was a blow...
On February 23, 2009 Glen was admitted to the hospital due to the severe pain in his ribs. On February 28, 2009 Glen receives a soft release into Hospice care. He signs a DNR and other forms necessary to receive hospice home care.
One March 19, remembering, I wrote:
Death came silently, without any appearance of struggle, simply a kind of surrender as Glen’s body wore out on Saturday, March 14. Brenda and I both watched the final two breaths, Glen’s adam’s apple moving slowly until stopping completely. No death rattle - just silence.
Now, I am left to feel again the wave of sorrow crash over me as I wait and watch Glen’s mother embark on the same journey. So much alike, mother and son. Grief smashes apart my heart.
How cruel this cancer is. It is a nighmare that goes on, never ending. Each time it enters our lives, it becomes more insidious.
ReplyDeleteHow horrible that the living need suffer so.
When does the greiving for the lost ones end.
Yes - I hate cancer - the older we get the more we suffer from 4-ever grief as those we love slip away.
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